January 20, 2007

• O So long…

  WOW….Its been TO long since we’ve spoken so I have much catching up to do.Well I’ve officially been in Germany since Dec.7th.Flew into Frankfurt,stayed 2days in Hanau & am currently Stationed in Wiesbaden. The life over here is so Diffrent but its strange cause many times I find myself feeling familiar,Like I’ve been here or belong here.I stayed with a good friend during X-mas & her bday was yesterday so me & the Fellas went to chill with at the Pub & EuroPalace.It was a nice night to begin with but it ended HORRIBLY with my closest friend here getting assaulted by these turkish bouncers & all I could do was beg them to stop in fear for my life & his. Backing up a lil during AIT Grandma mary passed….I couldn’t attend the funural(although on 4hours away) due to miscommunication on my Drill Sgt’s Pt.Earlier this week I find out my Aunt Dot has also passed.When I was 1st told I was in Frankfurt & jus fine with all that had happened.Later that week I think just the pent up energy of being away from home,being alone & being misunderstood jus all gathered & I had an emotional break down.It washumbling because as of Late I have been astray from God & at that moment it was like I was FORCED to come to him because no1 or no-thing could help me better,Period.Mentally & Emotionally I am a very stable person who usually if not always is intouch with what he feels but as of late my feelings toward that have seem to numb and dull.Nolonger is my song of self Melodic & flawless but for once I find it hard to keep in touch or even in tune. I miss people & long for the opportunity to re-do things that I kno I shouldn’t have done.But then I wise up & realize no woulda-shoulda-coulda’s lol. Me and my parents have grown closer than ever & I love it but now physically were farther apart then ever.Dare I speak it to any1 here but I also find myself longing for companionsip or atleast some1 to lean on.Regardless I still smile because I kno things could be so much worse & I’m still content, just not “happy”. The army as a job really isn’t that bad,PT Is good for my body & my confidence.Theres nothing like pushing your mind & body to the limits only to surpass and find a whole new horizen of physical and mental strength.Work is Work,I definitly WILL NOT have a desk job when I re-join the civilian world but for now “Paper Pushing” is what I’ll do.New Years I spent with a couple of friends in Berlin and it was AWESOME. The architecture,the scenery, the History…It was all incredible. Since then i’ve jus been taking things slow,I go out here & there but I ssee & feel my taste of “entertainment” growing because the club jus doesn’t cut it for me much anymore.I’m about to go eat but I’ll definitly be writing more so until the next entry be blessed & stay tru~

  • 9:27 am
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